For eons we have heard that it is not good to be selfish and that one should strive to be unselfish.

Yet the very concept of being unselfish, of acting without self interest is an utter impossibility in the light of the fact that everyone of us will only do that which we believe to contribute the most to our perception of well being or happiness or that which keeps us further away from unhappiness, etc.

So in every conscious act, we are either moving towards that which we believe will make us happy or contribute to our well being or we are moving away from that which we believe takes away from our well being or that which we believe will makes us unhappy. All our actions then are made in view of what we believe constitutes well being and happiness - and our personal definition of well being and happiness of course can vary drastically from others.

What constitutes happiness, of course it's a subjective matter and at an extreme, the opium addicts happiness for example is based upon acquiring opium, whilst a mother's happiness is based upon nurturing her child while a saint's happiness and sense of well being is based upon serving God.

Every single person without exception is acting based upon what serves their perceived perception of their highest self interest. Although it is impossible to act without self interest' there is however a huge difference in the quality of self interest.

For eample, the teenagers self interest is based only upon his or her needs, due to immaturity teenagers for a time perceive themselves and their needs to be the very center of the whole universe, however their self interest is of a low type in that it benefits only the teenager.

Moving on to the opium addict, his very happiness is centered upon acquiring opium, and whilst it may make him happy for a while, the addiction to opium is certainly not good for his overall well being. Yet this addicts perception is that happiness rests within opium and so his every act is centered on acquiring this substance by hook or by crook regardless of whom it hurts in the process. Obviously this is a very low form of self interest in that not only is it of benefit to the addict for a moment, it actually does not contribute to the addicts well being in the long run and it hurts other people in the process - for example perhaps the suffering of the addicts family members.

Moving on, the happiness and well being of their children makes most parents happy, so they have a very strong inherent self interest in doing those things which contribute to their children's happiness and well being. Not for a moment do parents act without self interest, they may do things that make them unhappy such as for example working 2 jobs to provide a better environment for their children, however deep down they are content in the belief that they are adding to their children's well being. This type of self interest is of a higher and more mature type in that it benefits not only the parent, but also the children, it is an expansive self interest instead of narrow selfishness which benefits only the individual.

Going on to the level of a saint which the world perceives as the epitome of unselfishness we still find an someone acting in accordance with what serves his or her highest self interest. The saint may perceive that pleasing and serving God serves his best interest and doing that which contributes to his highest self interest makes the saint happy and so that is exactly what he or she will do. So the saint devoted to God serves his fellow man either on a local or national or perhaps even internationall level because serving people makes God happy and pleasing God whom the saint loves as much or perhaps more than his own self makes the saint happy.

The self interest of a saint is of a more mature type than the narrow selfishness of a teenager or opium addict or narrow self interest of parents, because it is more expansive type of self interest which not only makes the saint happy, not only contributes to his sense of well being but also benefits perhaps hundreds or thousands of others.

The only difference between the self interest of the teenager, opium addict, parent and saint is the perception of what constitutes the self. In the teenager only those things which make him happy or prevent him from being unhappy are a part of his self, those which do neither are ignored as useless. In the opium addict, opium is very much a part of his self, when he aquires it he is happy, when he does not have it he is unhappy. In the parent the child is very much a part of his or her own self, the happiness and well being of the child directly affects the happiness and well being of the parent. And in the saint service to others is very much a part of his own self since serving others makes God happy which contributes directly to the saints happiness and sense of well being. None act without some form of self interest.

Where self interest is of benefit only to a few, it is small minded, narrow, ignorant and immature.

Where self interest is of benefit to the individal and to many others - it is high minded, expansive, enlightened and of a more mature nature.

Since self interest can never be avoided, the only thing that a sane man or woman can really hope to do to overcome small minded, immature selfishness is to sublimate their vision to the mature, higher and more expansive type of self interest.

Again:

1. It is impossible for anyone to act without self interest at any time and
2. The type of self interest in any individual is directly related to his or her perception of what is a part of their 'self.'

Since the perception of the self is the only difference between small minded, narrow, immature and ignorant selfishness which only benefits the individual vs. higher, expansive, enlightened and more mature self interest which also benefits others -

And since the world is obviously a better place when individuals act in ways that also benefit others - the most vital question becomes what in truth is one's Real Self?

(by Pardeep Singh)

The issue of the real Self is covered on the following
page, please click on the link below to proceed.

THE REAL SELF